1998 Jeep Grand Cherokee Laredo 4X4 -- Sales Price: $4,999.00 (USD)

Price: $4,999.00 (USD) - Source: Kelly Blue Book

Color: Silver/Exterior Black/Interior

Engine: 6 Cylinder, On Demand 4 Wheel Drive

Amenities: Leather interior, Sunroof, Heated Seats, New Stereo (AM/FM Casette, 12 Disk CD Changer, Ipod Integration with Stereo, XM Satalite Radio, Upgraded Amplifier and Speakers), Tinted Windows

Additional Details: Great condition, new stereo, maintenance records, recently detailed

Seller: Victor Barge (victorbarge@yahoo.com / 612.605.1529)

I'm an Enneagram Type 3

Maybe this isn't a surprise to anyone who knows me, but I finally broke down and took the Free Enneagram Test today to see what personality type the test scored me as. The result was an Enneagram Type 3. This is what that means...

Enneagram Type 3

Healthy: Self-assured, energetic, and competent with high self-esteem: they believe in themselves and their own value. Adaptable, desirable, charming, and gracious. / Ambitious to improve themselves, to be "the best they can be" — often become outstanding, a human ideal, embodying widely admired cultural qualities. Highly effective: others are motivated to be like them in some positive way. At Their Best: Self-accepting, inner-directed, and authentic, everything they seem to be. Modest and charitable, self-deprecatory humor and a fullness of heart emerge. Gentle and benevolent.

Average: Highly concerned with their performance, doing their job well, constantly driving self to achieve goals as if self-worth depends on it. Terrified of failure. Compare self with others in search for status and success. Become careerists, social climbers, invested in exclusivity and being the "best." / Become image-conscious, highly concerned with how they are perceived. Begin to package themselves according to the expectations of others and what they need to do to be successful. Pragmatic and efficient, but also premeditated, losing touch with their own feelings beneath a smooth facade. Problems with intimacy, credibility, and "phoniness" emerge. / Want to impress others with their superiority: constantly promoting themselves, making themselves sound better than they really are. Narcissistic, with grandiose, inflated notions about themselves and their talents. Exhibitionistic and seductive, as if saying "Look at me!" Arrogance and contempt for others is a defense against feeling jealous of others and their success.

Unhealthy: Fearing failure and humiliation, they can be exploitative and opportunistic, covetous of the success of others, and willing to do "whatever it takes" to preserve the illusion of their superiority. / Devious and deceptive so that their mistakes and wrongdoings will not be exposed. Untrustworthy, maliciously betraying or sabotaging people to triumph over them. Delusionally jealous of others / Become vindictive, attempting to ruin others' happiness. Relentless, obsessive about destroying whatever reminds them of their own shortcomings and failures. Psychopathic, murder. Generally corresponds to the Narcissistic Personality Disorder. Key Motivations: Want to be affirmed, to distinguish themselves from others, to have attention, to be admired, and to impress others.

Do you think that it's accurate?

Happy Birthday Michelle!

Michelle Fuller's 30th Birthday Party

Tonight was a great time as we celebrated Michelle Fuller's 29th birthday at Buca's! We had good food, conversation, and company. Talk about variety... The guest list included singles, married folks, babies, and mature adults. And the food-- it just oozed calories...

Now that's the way to celebrate a birthday. Congrats Mrs. Fuller. Hope that we helped make your day special!

Back to the Grindstone

Today was my first day in my new job at International Decision Systems in the IDS Tower in downtown Minneapolis. It was quite a day...

Coincidentally, as I was matriculating through HR's New Member Orientation, there was a RIF or Reduction In Force (corporate speak for layoffs) occurring. There is a particular (and unsettling) irony when you are selecting health care plans, getting business cards printed, and scheduling "welcome aboard luncheons" as others are picking up their severance packages.

The company's explanation for the RIF was a global missed forecast of earnings, even though the Minneapolis office basically met expectations. Unfortunately, all IDS locations were impacted by the RIF from a headcount perspective.

The next question that I asked (which I'm sure you are asking by now also) is how secure my new job was given this news? I was assured that the reductions were "surgical" and "based upon performance" so (for now) my employment was solid.

On the bright side, I have a great office space, get along well with my boss and staff, and have some very interesting challenges that will grow me professionally and personally.

However, having been in the corporate world for 20 years, I think I need to hold off on the "you've got a job so you can go shopping impulse". This new arrangement is still on the honeymoon. Let's hope that it's a marriage made in heaven...

I've Got a New Job!

Great news!

Today I accepted a Manager - IT position with IDS Group (www.idsgroup.com) in downtown Minneapolis and I start 10/3/05.

The transition from Life Time Fitness has been smooth and both employers have been very generous during this process.

Thanks to all of you who have provided so much encouragement through your prayers and support. It really kept me from falling off the edge...

To celebrate, Maggie and I are joining friends to go up to Grand Marias on the North Shore for the weekend at a vacation rental home.

Happy Labor Day!

8-29-05 Job Update

I just wanted to thank everyone for the incredible amount of encouragement and prayer support during my job search. It's really been nice to know that people care AND are giving me great job leads...

The most promising situation is with a software company called International Decision Systems (http://www.idsgrp.com/) where I am interviewing for a management role. The company is a large tenant in the IDS building in downtown Minneapolis. I have interviewed 3 times over the last 2 weeks with their management team. Currently, I am one of 3 finalists and my last interview was today. I should know something by the end of the week.

I'll keep you posted. Thanks again!

Victor

As a side note, Maggie is recovering nicely from Lyme's disease. She will only be on antibiotics for another couple of weeks and then she should be fine!

Job Update

Friends:

Many of you know of the challenges that I have experienced in my work life over the last few months and I appreciate your support and prayers during that time. As of 8/16, I left my job at Life Time Fitness to pursue other opportunities.

This was not an easy decision but one that I contemplated with much thought and many prayers. The company has been very generous and I am now looking for employment opportunities (preferably in the Twin Cities area before Winter hits). I am also open to employment in other parts of the US.

For me the next step is networking, interviewing, and repeating the process. It's a numbers game. Any contacts that you may have (ie. recruiters, business owners, hiring managers, friends in HR) would be greatly appreciated!

I would ask for your continued support, prayers, and contact information as the next step for us is revealed.

Thanks,

Victor & Maggie

Maggie Has Lyme's Disease

I received an emergency call from the vet while in Kansas City to let me know that my black lab - Maggie - had tested positive for Lyme's Disease.

In case you're not up to date on your plagues and diseases, Lyme's Disease is transmitted primarily by the Deer Tick. I think that Maggie probably got infected on one of our recent camping trips. Amazingly, in Kansas City (where we relocated from) the vaccination is not required due to the rarity of transmission. Of course, "we're not in Kansas anymore..."

The symptoms of LD are joint stiffness, lethargy, and a high fever. Maggie has all of the symptoms. In some cases, the disease can be fatal. Fortunately, she has a great vet (Dr. Kroll at Flying Cloud Animal Hospital) and we caught the disease early enough that a full recovery is anticipated. In the meantime, she is definitely doing her part to support the pharmaceutical industry. Did I say how thankful I am that Maggie has pet insurance?

As of this morning, she is doing much better and I'm sure that we will be getting back to irritating the snot out of each other soon. That's my gauge for her being fully recovered. Let's keep our fingers crossed!

They Do!

I recently made the pilgrimage down to Kansas City to be an Usher in my friend Ken's wedding.


If any of you have "served" in this capacity, you understand the role. You're happy for the couple (Ken & Jane) and you don't complain about how much the cheap, plastic shoes hurt that you have to wear for 12 hours straight! Fortunately, there was more "happy" than "hurt" with this wedding.

Ken and I met when I first moved to KC. We attended the same church (Colonial Presbyterian) and both worked at Sprint. Finally, we were in the same Bible studies, team taught classes, and were both Discussion Group Leaders in Bible Study Fellowship. It's impossible to talk about my spiritual journey without Ken being in there somewhere...

Ken and Jane had a nice ceremony and I wish them the best in their marriage. With half of all Christian marriages failing, it really convicted me to pray for my friend's marriage. I can't imagine how two humans could make each other more miserable than to be in a bad marriage. I sincerely don't want that for them...

On a lighter note, for any of you needing detailed instructions on how to perform usher duties at a wedding, please read these "Usher's Instructions". Our wedding coordinator left nothing to chance so they are VERY thorough.

One other piece of friendly advice: if you have to do a roundtrip from Minneapolis to Kansas City in 72 hours and your choice is flying or driving, it's worth the plane ticket!

I Think I'm Addicted...

From what I understand, the first step in recovery is to admit that you have a problem -- so here goes.

Hi, my name is Victor and I think that I'm addicted to going camping on the North Shore in the summer.

Now is the part where you say, "Hi Victor"...

Seriously, my camping buddies (Adam, Johnathan, Tim, Jason, Naomi, and Matt) have spoiled me. We've had 3 killer "car camping" trips this summer and I've started thinking that I could get used to this. The disclaimers are:

1. I'm going camping with people who know what they are doing, are very patient with me, and get along with each other.
2. We have the right equipment (including 98% Deet insect repellent).
3. The weather has cooperated.
4. This is "car camping" so ipods and gourmet coffee are allowed, per Matt Henry.
5. There has been the right mix of alcohol, Texas Hold 'Em, and cigars.
6. Maggie has been our protector a.k.a "City Dog With An Attitude".
7. We've chosen to have fun no matter what!

These are some photos from our August Trip to Lamb's Resort, near Tofte on the North Shore.

This trip was a little "dicey" because yours truly brought everything but the Coleman stove and our propane lantern (I told you that I was an amateur in training...). This omission forced Jason, Maggie, and I to retire to the tent early until Tim arrived the next morning with the supplies.

The trip was salvaged by GREAT weather, the hiking, the trip to Grand Marais, and the chance to get away from everything except the bugs... Now that's camping!

Going to the Water...

Solomon's Porch recently had water baptisms for 3 of our new members (David, Ken, and Chris) at Minnehaha Falls.

One of the guys at the park saw us and wanted to be baptized also. His name was also David.

The following link will take you to my photo album of the event. Congrats to all!

Mom's Visit to MN

After a brief hiatus, I'm back to the world of blogging...

My Mom (Patricia) ventured up from my hometown in FL to the Northwest to visit a few weeks ago (7/21 - 7/25) and it was a great time! We did the MOA (Mall of America thing), the Walker Art Center, the Guthrie Theatre (His Girl Friday), the Farmers' Market, a stone massage for her at Life Time Fitness, various meals at Uptown restaurants, and finally church at Solomon's Porch.

If that sounds a little exhausting, you're right - it was. But, with parental visits occurring once a decade, you have to make the most of it... Also, we were in the weather sweet spot of 6 weeks where FL and MN have similar weather patterns. In other words, she felt right at home. Sweaters were only required in the evenings. As an aside, Maggie is wearing the "lamp shade thing" in the photo because she was licking the hair off one of her paws. The vet explained that it could be anything from anxiety to a mosquito bite. Either way, it was a $50 vet bill for the "lamp shade thing" and dog neosporin. Thanks be to God for pet insurance.

In between great talks with my Mom, introducing her to my friends, and explaining this "MN Nice phenomenon", I realized that I am very blessed to have such caring parents. My stepdad didn't make the trip due to a bad back and the news that his sister (Aunt Jeanette) had been diagnosed with terminal liver cancer the week before.

During her visit, I noticed the aging of my Mom and the need to help her realize dreams that she has while her health allows her to travel. With 4 kids, my folks made a lot of sacrifices for me and my sisters to have the things we have. It sure was nice to see her live out a dream this weekend. That was a very small gift back to her.

Oh, and what did she think of my new friends (read: rotating support group, moving crew, and Onstar assistance)? She said, "God has blessed you with so many 'good people'. I won't have to worry about you being so far away anymore." She also thought that my church was great. I think her quote was, "I've never seen so many positive young people. If there were a church like this in our home town, I would definitely attend". As you can see, that's why I love my Mom...

PBS TV special 7/10/05

There will be a PBS TV special on the Emergent Church movement with part one of two segments airing Sunday, 7/10 from 9:00 - 10:00 AM CST (Channel 2 in the Twin Cities viewing area).

Film crews spent some time at my church (Solomon's Porch) gathering content for the show. If you're interested, the following links might prove helpful:

PBS Online transcript and webcast of the Show

Interview with Solomon's Porch Pastor - Doug Pagitt

Solomon's Porch church web site

Emergent Website

A Tribute to Luther

If you've been an R&B music fan over the past 20 years (especially slow, soulful ballads) then you've probably heard the silky smooth voice of Luther Vandross. He passed away on 7/1/05, never fully recovering from a stroke that he suffered in 2003.

For me, Luther's songs got me through lonely evenings, hurtful break-ups, and long road trips. There was just something so soothing about many of his songs that caused me to deeply connect with them. It's like he KNEW what I was feeling...

Although there won't be any new Luther songs, the following link will take you to the site that is playing free streaming music from his last album (which coincidentally won a Grammy). You may never be the Luther fan that I've become, but hopefully one of his songs will connect with you one evening as you sit in front of your fireplace with a glass of wine, next to your significant other. And as one of his songs says, it's "So Amazing"...

RIP Luther

Happy Birthday USA from Camp Clearwaters!

Camp Clearwaters 2005

Adam, Johnathan, Naomi, Tim, Matt, Maggie, and I set off for fun and adventure at Camp Clearwaters in Stillwater, WI over this 4th of July weekend. Fun and adventure is exactly what we found!

Although you need GPS to find this place, it was worth it. Kudos to Naomi for securing camping priviledges for us at the camp. With a MN State Park shutdown looming, this was a great alternative.

In my camping educational progression, Adam, Matt, and Tim are slowly weaning me off the "creature comforts" of home for the lure of grease filled eggs, mosquito bites everywhere, and sleeping through thunderstorms in a tent with water all around you. Of course biking, fishing, canoeing, horse back riding, Texas Hold'em, fireworks, and a camping hammock more than make up for any inconveniences...

You really get to know someone on a camping trip. I guess outhouses, Deet, and spotty sanitary conditions tend to reveal things about people that are nicely tucked away under a cozy passive-aggressive surface. The great thing is that after a few "bonding experiences" I found myself talking about things that really mattered.

Tim lost his mucho expensive fly fishing rod on this trip when it fell overboard but we're still hoping that it will show up and an honest person will return it to it's rightful owner. Otherwise, Tim might need a prescription for anti-depressants.

Maggie was living large and went from "dropped food custodian" to "Canoe Lab Patrol Canine" effortlessly. Her swimming skills were again deemed impressive by all who saw her.

The next few weeks will be very hectic so it was especially nice to have a nice holiday weekend beforehand. Sometimes blessings come in unexpected ways. Who would have thought me, camping, and MN? -- you 'betcha!

The Ten Best Things To Say If You Get Caught Sleeping At Your Desk...

I received this in an email from a friend and thought it worthy of sharing...

10. "They told me at the blood bank this might happen."

09. "This is just a 15 minute power-nap like they raved about in that management course you sent me to."

08. "Whew! Guess I left the top off the White-Out. You probably got here just in time!"

07. "I wasn't sleeping! I was meditating on the mission statement and envisioning a new paradigm."

06. "I was testing my keyboard for drool resistance."

05. "I was doing a highly specific Yoga exercise to relieve work-related stress. Are you discriminatory toward people who practice Yoga?"

04. "Why did you interrupt me? I had almost figured out a solution to our biggest problem."

03. "The coffee machine is broken..."

02. "Someone must've put decaf in the wrong pot..."

And the #1 best thing to say if you get caught sleeping at your desk.....

01. "..... in Jesus' name. Amen."

When Love Becomes A Verb...

What Kind of Love Are We Talking About?

As we are in the month of June and will probably hear the I Corinthians 13 passage in most weddings that we attend in the next few weeks, I thought I would share some of my thoughts on agape love.

When I read the "Love Chapter" and think of agape love, this is what I am challenged TO DO...

• Speak with the innocence, simplicity, and purity of a child.
• Allow words to come from my heart, bypassing the filter of my head.
• Give without strings attached.
• Acknowledge the humanity of others whom I disagree.
• Let others toot my horn.
• Surrender my "right to be right".
• Stop keeping score in disagreements.
• Listen versus preparing a rebuttal when someone is talking.
• Let God distribute punishment without my assistance.
• Look for the potential in people.

These things are hard to do! Anyone who knows me also knows that there's no way that I can be self-righteous at all when it comes to this stuff. My point in writing this is to see if anyone else thinks that there is more to the "Love Chapter" than just instructions for newlyweds? I think the Apostle Paul had a broader audience in mind. How does it read for you?

Maggie's Birthday

Maggie

Today is Maggie's 49th birthday (seven in human years) and we are planning to make it a fun day! I'm thinking about a walk around Lake Calhoun, the off leash dog park, and MAYBE a trip to Petsmart!

For those who are not pet lovers, I realize that this level of pet devotion is a bit over the top. I used to be one of those people. Somehow, a little black lab found a way to change all of that for me...

I picked up Maggie from a breeder in South Dakota as a 9 month old "started dog". She was the runt of her litter and not large enough to be sold as a hunting dog, but (according to the breeder) was one of the smartest dogs he had ever trained! The breeder was a dog show judge and when I brought Maggie home she was spaded, house broken, and obedience trained. Knowing my aversion (read lack of patience) for bad behaving animals, Maggie was the perfect pet for me. In fact, I had to go to obedience training to learn what she already knew.

The picture above is from a "photo shoot" that Maggie had when she was "discovered" as a dog model at a coffee shop in Kansas City. We were able to get some free pictures and good press from it, but no modeling contract. I still have to keep my day job...

If you haven't met Maggie, I hope that you do someday. They say that dogs are man's best friend. I'm not sure about that but I know that this little lab has a pretty good hold on my heart!

"Getting Away From It All" in the Great White North

Memorial Day Weekend 2005

As many Americans do, my Memorial Day Weekend celebration this year consisted of a personal time of reflection and gratitude for those who paid the ultimate price for the freedom that I enjoy. Then, I enjoyed that freedom by "getting away from it all"!

This year I joined some friends at St. Croix State Park, which is about 1.5 hours North of the Twin Cities for a few days of "primitive camping".

Some of you that know me are either laughing uncontrollably or you're wondering if I have a twin that enjoys camping 'cause ya know I don't...' Well, as they say, "sometimes you can teach an old dog a new trick".

My camp mates were Matt Henry, Adam Walker, and Tim Watkins from my church. As usual, we represented a very "diverse group" in life experiences, age, religious and political beliefs, and camping skill levels. Guess who the newbie was? Amazingly, our backgrounds led to some great conversations as we hiked, fished, cooked, ate like hogs, and struggled to make our REI camping equipment work the way it was supposed to. Maggie also got to use her outdoor survival training and superior sense of smell to get into everything imaginable. It must be a gift...

These are some of the learnings from the weekend for me:

• Ticks are vicious and have a death wish for YOUR blood supply. You can only win a war when you recognize that you are in one. This is a war!
• Mosquito's are here early this year. The rumors are true!
• Everything taste better swimming in grease on the grill.
• Matt will have a horse within a year. You can see the chemistry already. Do people have showers to get horse stuff?
• You can play Texas Hold'em with sunflower seeds as chips. We proved it.
• A Frisbee works as a cutting board if the need arises.
• If I ever need to see a urologist, Adam will be my doctor.
• Victor's Christmas List Item #1: A French Press coffee pot!
• I need to learn the 3 guitar jazz chords that Tim knows. It could be the key that unleashes my currently undiscovered musical talent!
• Maggie is just as much fun in the middle of a state park as she is in the middle of my living room.
• As with most things, there is the pleasure and the pain of eating the durian fruit.
• Sipping Jameson and smoking cigars on a star filled night in MN with friends is almost as much fun as laying on South Beach feeling the ocean breeze in your face -- Almost.

Most importantly, I realized the need to "get away from it all" more often. There's got to be a balance between enjoying life and having a satisfying career. This weekend I got closer to finding it. Thanks to all my friends that participated -- Mission Accomplished!

The Dream Team

If you're a sports junkie like me, you may remember when professional basketball players were first allowed to play in the Olympics. The US Team was called "The Dream Team". The reason is because it contained the best players (at the time) in the NBA (Michael Jordan, Magic Johnson, Larry Bird, etc.). When it comes to friends, Bruce and Clyde (pictured left to right) are part of my Dream Team...

With my 4 month kitchen remodel project just completing, the timing could not have been more perfect for friends to come up to help! At least that's how I saw it.

They thought they were on vacation...

We had a great time eating, working, and sight-seeing. Maggie also enjoyed our house guests. As you know, one human just can't provide enough love and attention for a black lab. I try, but in Maggie's world, "more is more!"

Did I mention how fortunate I was to have great friends?

My Friend Derek

Some of you may have met my friend Derek. He lives in Kansas City and (like many other friends of mine) has ventured to this Canadian suburb called Minneapolis to visit during our summerfest.

Our weekend consisted of spending money at REI, IKEA, and many fine restaurants in the Twin Cities. Derek also visited my church and had a great time.

Being new to the area, one of the things that I miss the most are my friends that I have built history with. These friends know me so well that they can finish my sentences, call me out when I exaggerate the truth, and order for me when I'm not at the table. In short, they know me. Derek is that kind of friend.

Hopefully throughout the years, we will continue to encourage and challenge each other "as iron sharpens iron" (Proverbs 27:17). When I think of life's blessings, my friends are at the top of the list!

Back in the Day...

Remember when people would reminisce about "the good ole days"? They would say that things were "so much simpler and less complicated back then"? Before agreeing, I thought about it for a minute or so and I'm not so sure that I buy into that. For instance:

• Before the Civil Rights Act of 1964, there is no way that I could have the job that I have today.
• Before the discovery of penicillin, this nasty two week old sinus infection (that I've been medicating with prescription drugs) could be life threatening.
• Inter-racial dating and marriage for me in many states would have been illegal.
• My female co-workers would not have a legal right to equal pay for equal work.
• My education would have occurred at segregated schools.
• I would have never been able to watch the talent of Tiger Woods, because he would have never been allowed to play golf on a course.

I realize that this post might be more than a little self-serving and dramatic, but I write it to remind myself more than anyone else how blessed I am to live at this point in history. For all of the remaining -- and there are a lot of remaining -- social injustices, issues of religious intolerance, and situations of cultural turmoil, I'm very grateful to say that we're "here in the day". God help us so that 30 years from now no one wants to go back to 2005 as the best year in humanity. Hopefully, our best years are in front of us!

What is Community?

Recently, I was trying to explain to someone why the value of "community" at my church (Solomon's Porch) was so important. Unfortunately, all of my explanations fell short.

Later on, as I thought about it more, several images came to mind of when I "felt" like I was engaged as part of the community at the Porch. These were some of those times...

• Slouching on a sofa with a stranger, drinking Dunn Bro's coffee, and listening to the weekly message.
• Holding Josh & Michelle's son (Toby) and playing "telephone" with him during the service.
• Going back for seconds of bread during communion because I was hungry -- and not being the only one in line twice!
• Having a person that I don't know walk up and say "May the Life of Jesus Be in You", and mean it!
• Getting a chair massage from the resident therapist (Marlene) during the service.
• Grabbing a burito after the service with Pastor Doug and hearing about his week.
• Viewing comments from me and others projected on the screen from our Tuesday evening Bible Discussion Group.
• Having the keyboard guy from the Worship Team (Cory) come sit by me during a song break and invite me to his next gig.
• Grabbing half price appetizers and beer after church with people from the Porch and connecting with them through meaningful conversations.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that I think community is about connecting. It's about enjoying and tolerating, celebrating and mourning, but mostly about sharing you life with others.

Our church isn't perfect, because people aren't perfect. But, everytime someone reaches their hand out to me to hold as we sing the benediction, I realize that this is a strong symbol. We are connecting our hands, our hearts, our families, our dreams, and our lives with something larger than ourselves. For me, that connection creates a community -- and community is a very good thing!

A Prayer for Unselfishness

The following is a prayer from my heart for God to make me less selfish.

Lord, I want what I want, and I want it now
I want to be comfortable
And I want to be happy
I sometimes act like it's all about me
I like my independence
But I love my freedom
Even so, I know that You have more for me...

Teach me to care about the needs of others
To notice how I can share
Give me companionship to celebrate my successes,
A listening ear to hear my struggles,
And a friendly hand to pick me up when I fail

Remind me that my agenda isn't yours
That interruptions are often hidden blessings
Open my eyes, my hands, and my heart
Show me how to live with people that are not like me
In short, show me how to live as a member of your Kingdom.

I'm In...

On Sunday I joined Solomon's Porch as my home church. What was amazing was how it just felt like the next logical step. There was not a lot of deep soul searching or doubt, just a sense that it was the logical progression based upon my involvement, interests, and newly formed relationships. Listed below are the requirements to be a "Covenant Participant" (read: new member) at "The Porch":

1. Be one who seeks to live life with God in the way of Jesus.
2. Seek to live life consistent with the generous orthodoxy, ancient creeds, and Scriptures of the church.
3. Stay reconciled with the people of the Solomon's Porch community.
4. Involvement in the life of Solomon's Porch including prayer, participation, and finances.
5. Invest in the ministry and dreams of Solomon's Porch.

As basic as these things sound, it's amazing what they don't say. I think that they will deeply challenge my paradigms regarding optional church involvement, my right to sit in judgment of church leadership, and my option to selective fellowship with others. It's amazing how five things so simply stated can be so hard to do.

Stay tuned to my blog to see how it turns out...

Sunday Morning Humor... (Author Unknown)

One Sunday morning, the pastor noticed little Alex standing in the foyer of the church staring up at a large plaque. It was covered with names with small American flags mounted on either side of it.

The seven year old had been staring at the plaque for some time, so the pastor walked up, stood beside the little boy, and said quietly, "Good morning Alex." "Good morning Pastor," he replied , still focused on the plaque. "Pastor, what is this?" he asked. The pastor said, "Well, son, it's a memorial to all the young men and women who died in the service."

Soberly, they just stood together, staring at the large plaque. Finally, little Alex's voice, barely audible and trembling with fear, asked, "Which service, the 8:00 or the 10:30?

Psalm 25 - A Prayer for Defense, Guidance, & Pardon

We are studying the Psalms for the next few weeks at my church and one that really hit home with me was Psalm 25. When I prayed it tonight, this is how it came from my heart...

You are my father and my life is yours.
I am trusting in you.
Please protect me from those who want to take me out.

Guide and direct me father by your truth.
Give me faith to trust you.
I know that your character is to show mercy and compassion for those who need it.

I also know that you are good!
You are merciful and faithful to those who show humility
I ask you to lead me as I try to follow your ways.

I've fallen short and I'm sorry--really sorry.
I know that you are my friend and my teacher.
I believe that you'll protect me from those who hate me.

Father, I'm worried and cannot sleep tonight.
I feel alone and helpless.
My problems seem overwhelming.
I am hopeless and in despair.
I have no answers.
I've blown it...
Please forgive me.
I have no where else to turn.
My enemies are circling like buzzards.
But, you've got my back!
My hope is in you!
I know that you won't abandon me because I'm your child.

"A New Kind of Pope..."

My opinion of the selection of Cardinal Ratzinger to become Benedict XVI (and I hope that I'm proven wrong) is best summarized by Andrew Sullivan's (editor of The New Republic) quote from his blog:

THE POLITICAL ANALOGY: I was trying to explain last night to a non-Catholic just how dumb-struck many reformist Catholics are by the elevation of Ratzinger. And then I found a way to explain. This is the religious equivalent of having had four terms of George W. Bush only to find that his successor as president is Karl Rove. Get it now?

Guess Who Came to Dinner?

Brian McLaren

As part of our fellowship ritual, most of my recent get-togethers at Solomon's Porch seem to end up at Chipotle's Restaurant. I usually order a naked steak burrito with black beans. In that respect, tonight was no different. What was different was what happened afterward.

My pastor - Doug Pagitt - knows Brian McLaren (another pastor and author well known in the Emergent movement) personally and invited me and a few friends to meet him at TGI Fridays after a lecture that Brian gave tonight at a local Presbyterian church. I'm not a "Christian Speaker Groupie", but I was refreshingly pleased to hear someone as well known as he speak candidly and frankly about a realm of issues. There were no "sunday school answers". Instead there was recognition of the complexity of issues and the challenge to engage both the culture and the Church in constructive dialogue.

As you know, I typically don't read many books (my attention span is more like a magazine article), but after tonight I think that I may have to break down and get the "books on tape" version of some of Brian's books to listen to on my ipod. Who knows, maybe I'll become "A New Kind of Christian"...

Hallelujah!

I must admit that we Minnesotians probably celebrate the coming of Spring more than anywhere in the US - and I understand why. After months of weather that caused you to fear for your life when you stepped outside your door, Spring comes. Now you can see AND feel the sun. How could you not be ecstatic?

Not that we didn't wonder if we had been forsaken. The calendar announced Spring, but the recent Snow Emergency didn't get the memo. This MUST be what the Hebrew children felt like when they were wondering out in the desert...

My new concern is that without my skullcap my bald spot will get sunburn. What a wonderful problem to have!!!

I live in Uptown and there was a pilgrimage to the Lakes over the weekend. I can say that the dog people equaled the number of power walkers at Lake Calhoun. Watch your step... The roller-bladers were back too. People watching had returned to my neighborhood!

The Lake was frozen except for the 15 feet or so around the edges, but that was immaterial. The joy of Creation was that we could be outside and not lose a body part. In celebration of this event, I'm going to do something that I never thought I would do - return my Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) lamps. They're not needed anymore.

Spring has Sprung, hallelujah!

Grieving With Hope

Today at 3:45 PM CST, Granny Ruth went to be with the Lord forever.

I am so glad that I got to see her and have a final conversation with her today before she died. It's ironic how you imagine what you will say in these defining moments, yet they hardly ever turn out as dramatic as envisioned. That's how it was today. I think that the reason for the lack of fanfare was that our "crucial conversations" had occurred all along the way. There was no need for a speech of "crucial regrets", just a temporary goodbye.

Three things that were included in virtually every conversation that we had since college were these thoughts:

GR: Granny Ruth loves you very much.
Me: I love you too Granny.

GR: Granny is so proud of you.
Me: I'm proud of you too Granny.

GR: God is So Good!
Me: Yes Granny. He really is.

Those were my last words to her today. It really was just that simple...

Tonight, Granny is getting caught up with the rest of her family in heaven: her daughther (Delores), her sisters (Ann Lee & Pearlie), and her husband (Wakefield). Most importantly she is no longer in pain and she is in the pressence of our Lord. Because of these things, even though me and my family are facing a great loss, we can grieve with hope -- an eternal hope (I Thes. 4:13-18).

Thanks to all of my friends who have been there for me during this experience. You will never know how grateful I am. My prayer is that you will feel this loved when you lose a loved one. You may not be part of my biological family, but you ARE family.

Victor

The Process of Acceptance

Today my Mom called with some tough news to hear. She told me that my Granny Ruth has had some difficult days and that there is nothing that the doctors can do except "make her comfortable".

As you know, I love my Granny Ruth dearly and feel very blessed that she is a part of my life. I also thought that I had accepted that she was in the process of dying. Both things are true. Today I learned something else. There is a big gap between mentally accepting that someone is going to die and practically accepting what that means...

Practically speaking, that means a hospice level of treatment versus treatments geared toward recovery. It means proactive planning for final arrangements versus hopefulness that the status quo will continue. Finally, it means letting the humanity of a person go so that they can die with dignity and suffer less.

I found myself coaching my Mom in these realities, yet realizing that our heads were far ahead of our hearts in the area of acceptance. The duality of this experience is that you're relieved that your loved one won't continue to suffer, yet you feel guilty that you're relieved!

In the midst of this experience, I also feel sad but not hopeless. As I am sure others have learned, oftentimes, the person dying is more ready for the experience than their loved ones. That's definitely the case for our family. Granny Ruth has been ready for decades. Now, she seems to be the object that God is using to teach me and my family the process of acceptance.

It's working...

Wisdom from my friend Damian...

1. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.

2. If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will achieve, its full potential -- that word would be "meetings."

3. There is a very fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness".

4. People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours with them.

5. You should not confuse your career with your life.

6. Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance!

7. Never lick a steak knife.

8. The most destructive force in the universe is gossip.

9. You will never find anybody who can give you a clear and compelling reason why we observe daylight savings time.

10. You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests that you think she's pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment.

11. There comes a time when you should stop expecting other people to make a big deal about your birthday. That time is age eleven.

12. The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status or ethnic background, is that, deep down inside, we ALL believe that we are above average drivers.

13. A person, who is nice to you, but rude to a waiter, is not a nice person. (This is very important. Pay attention. It never fails.)

14. Your friends love you anyway.

15. Never be afraid to try something new! . Remember that a lone amateur built the Ark. A large group of professionals built the Titanic.

Where Do I Lead a Double Life?

I was reading an editorial in the Kansas City Star newspaper today about how shocked the church goers were in Park City, KS when they learned that one of their members, Dennis Rader, was accused of being the BTK killer. While I'm not even remotely equating most of our behaviors with the horrible things this man is accused of doing, I can see in myself and others the capacity that exist simultaneously to do good and horrible deeds. The verse that the editorial writer uses is:

The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it? — Jeremiah 17:9

A question that I asked myself is, "what keeps most people from dipping off the edge like Dennis Rader is accused of doing?" Another question I asked myself, "was I just white-washing my 'horrible deeds' based upon my evangelical pecking order of rating evil"?

I didn't like the answers that were popping up in my head. I'd like to think that I don't have a self-hating problem, but I do realize that I love and NEED the gift of God's grace daily just as much as Dennis Rader.

Finally, I was challenged by the idea that God CAN forgive this guy and asks me to forgive him too if he sincerely repents. That's when I hit my self-righteous speed bump. It looks like there's still some road construction in my heart. I guess I need to put down that stone in my hand...

How are you challenged in this area? I'd love to hear how it's playing out in your life.

In the Beginning... (alternate translation)

In the beginning, God created the Heavens and the Earth and populated the Earth with broccoli, cauliflower and spinach, green, yellow, and red vegetables of all kinds, so Man and Woman would live long and healthy lives. Then using God's great gifts, Satan created Ben and Jerry's Ice Cream and Krispy Crème Donuts. And Satan said, "You want chocolate with that?" And Man said, "Yes!" and Woman said, "and as long as you're at it, add some sprinkles." And they gained 10 pounds. And Satan smiled.

And God created the healthful yogurt that Woman might keep the figure that Man found so fair. And Satan brought forth white flour from the wheat, and sugar from the cane and combined them. And Woman went from a size 6 to a size 14.

So God said, "Try my fresh green salad." And Satan presented Thousand-Island Dressing, buttery croutons and garlic toast on the side. And Man and Woman unfastened their belts following the repast. God then said, "I have sent you heart healthy vegetables and olive oil in which to cook them." And Satan brought forth deep fried fish and chicken-fried steak so big it needed its own platter. And Man gained more weight and his cholesterol went through the roof.

God then created a light, fluffy white cake, named it "Angel Food Cake," and said, "It is good." Satan then created chocolate cake and named it "Devil's Food."God then brought forth running shoes so that His children might lose those extra pounds. And Satan gave them cable TV with a remote control so Man would not have to toil changing the channels. And Man and Woman laughed and cried before the flickering blue light and gained pounds. God brought forth the potato, naturally low in fat and brimming with nutrition.

And Satan peeled off the healthful skin and sliced the starchy center into chips and deep-fried them. And Man gained pounds.

God then gave lean beef so that Man might consume fewer calories and still satisfy his appetite. And Satan created McDonald's and its 99-cent double cheeseburger. Then said, "You want fries with that?" And Man replied, "Yes! And super size them!" And Satan said, "It is good." And Man went into cardiac arrest. God sighed and created quadruple bypass surgery.

Then Satan created HMOs.

Toby's 1st Birthday Party!

Toby is Josh & Michelle's son from Solomon's Porch and 2-26 was his first birthday party. You should have been there! Toby is starting to take steps and I've already dubbed him "t-mobile" once he starts walking. Some kids just get the best of the gene pool. This is one of them...

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What I've Learned About Winter in MN

1. Ice is not your friend -- remote car starters are.

2. The words snow and emergency together = life threatening situation.

3. Skull caps are like underwear -- you need to wear them everywhere.

4. If the apostle Peter struggled to walk on water -- then I can apply that knowledge to frozen lakes .

5. Ice fishing should be left to professionals and those with lots of life insurance.

6. Expect Seasonal Affect Disorder (SAD) and medicate appropriately.

7. Never allow yourself to run low on toilet tissue, beer, or gas for your car. These are necessities.

8. Brisk, refreshing, and invigorating are just euphemisms for butt cold.

9. Enjoy warm days to their fullest, knowing that colder days are coming.

10. As a matter of mental health, book your warm weather vacations early and post them in a prominent place to "keep hope alive".

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A Living History Lesson

Since we are in Black History month recognizing influential African Americans, I thought that I would introduce you to my Granny Ruth. She is probably the strongest Christian that I've ever met.

Granny raised 5 children by herself after Grandaddy Wakefield was killed in a train accident when he was 39. She worked as a house-keeper and with the help of her generous employer was able to put all her children through graduate school. Then, at age 65, she returned to school for her GED!

She helped raise me until my Mom finished school and prayed for me daily until I became a believer at age 19. Her favorite saying when you ask her a tough question is "baby the Scripture says..."

Most amazing, growing up in the Deep South during segregation, you would expect that she would have legitmate reasons for racial hatred. She was not like that. My Granny spoke about stories of giving up her seat on the bus when she was 9 months pregnant due to the law at that time. She also explained how she was expected to enter through the back door of some establishments and drink from different water fountains. Her peace came from knowing that God gave her an identity in Christ that superceeded the world's injustice.

Today, we can't even imagine that type of country. I can't... She says that we have made progress but we have such a "long ways to go". Her example is very simple: she trust God completely and asks him for even the mundane things in life. Her intimacy with Him is frankly beyond my ability to comprehend.

Unfortunately, in the last couple of years she has fallen prey to Alzheimers and at age 86 has become a different person that requires nursing home and now hospice care. She probably won't be here much longer, but she has made an incredible difference in my life. Her favorite Bible verse - what else: Psalm 23.

You may not see her before she leaves this Earth, but I'll introduce you to her in heaven!


Granny Ruth
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Meet My Black Female Roommate...

Victor & Maggie


She wakes me up every morning, is happy to see me come home, thinks that I am the center of her universe, and can't stop kissing me.

For me, I get a great example of submission, obedience, and loyalty. She even runs after my bad Frisbee tosses. What else can a guy ask for from a black lab?

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Who Are You Becoming?

Questions that I am pondering...

Do you know how to be what you were created to be?

To walk in that truth with integrity?

Can you accept your limitations and constraints?

Knowing that God considers you a saint?

Rest -- in knowing that you are the "apple of His eye"!

(Psalm 17:5-8)

Lifting Up the Hood

Tonight at my church I was asked to share a little bit about my spiritual journey. It was very helpful primarily because it caused me to have to think about it in order to tell others. In case you missed it, listed below are the cliff notes...

Major Themes of My Life

• God's Protection / Provision
• God's Grace & Mercy
• God's Faithfulness

Some of My Biggest Challenges in my Spiritual Journey

• Living in "community" with other Christians beyond greetings on Sunday evenings and superficial conversation.
• Integrating my faith in all aspects of my life (work, family, friends).
• Having more patience with people that are in different stages of life than I am.

Meaningful Passage

God's relentless pursuit of intimacy with us: Romans 8:35-39

As my friends, you know me well. If I'm blowing BS, call me on it. This blog is just my viewpoint. I'd love to hear yours...